Browse Items

Demolition & Site Prep Service

Small structure demolition, concrete breaking, site clearing, grading. Ideal Excavating. We break it down clean and leave the site ready to build. No mess, no shortcuts. Albert Kenel's son doesn't leave a messy jobsite.

Golf Lesson -- Fundamentals for Beginners

Grip, stance, swing, follow through. I don't teach you to hit it far. I teach you to hit it straight. Consistency beats distance every time. Just like Albert Kenel said: do it right or don't do it. Clubs provided.

Golf Club Set (Complete, Right-Handed)

Full set: driver, 3-wood, 5-wood, 4-PW irons, sand wedge, putter. Bag with stand included. Good enough to play 18 holes, not so expensive you cry when you shank one into the lake. Return them clean.

Essay Writing Workshop -- Truth as a Weapon

The essay is the most dangerous literary form because it requires you to think clearly and say what you mean. No hiding behind characters. No hiding behind metaphor. Just you and the truth and the page. I'll teach you to write sentences that change the temperature in the room.

Open Tuning Guitar Workshop -- Beyond Standard

I play in fifty different tunings because standard tuning bored me. I'll teach you DADGAD, open D, open C, and my own tunings that don't have names. Different tunings make the guitar a different instrument. One guitar, fifty voices.

Short Fiction Workshop -- Labyrinths of the Mind

We write stories that are puzzles. Stories where the form IS the content. A detective story that is also a metaphysical treatise. A book review of a book that doesn't exist. I'll teach you to write fiction that makes the reader think they are dreaming while fully awake.

Afrobeat Rhythm Workshop -- 45 Minutes of Groove

Afrobeat songs last forty-five minutes because that's how long it takes to reach transcendence. I'll teach you the interlocking rhythms -- drums, percussion, bass, guitar, horns -- that create the groove. Everyone plays a pattern. Nobody plays the whole thing. Together, you are unstoppable.

Stencil Making Workshop -- Your Message on Any Wall

I'll teach you to cut stencils, mix paint ratios, and get your message up in under sixty seconds. The art is in the preparation -- the execution takes less time than a traffic light. We practice on canvas first. What you do after that is your business. I never saw you. You were never here.

Professional Stencil Kit (Multi-Layer)

Mylar sheets, precision craft knife, self-healing cutting mat, spray paint adaptor for even coverage. Everything you need to make multi-layer stencils that look like they were screenprinted. Also includes a hoodie. You'll need the hoodie.

Rat (Signed Print -- Or Is It?)

A print of one of my rats. Signed. Or is it? That's the question with everything I make. Authentication in the art world is a racket. This print is real if you believe it's real. Isn't that how all art works? Comes with a certificate of ambiguity.

Documentary Filmmaking Workshop -- Truth on a Budget

You don't need a studio. You don't need a crew. You need a camera, a microphone, a laptop, and something worth saying. I'll teach you to research, script, edit, and publish a documentary that changes how people see the world. The mainstream won't touch your story? Good. Publish it yourself. That's what the internet is for.

Mobile Broadcasting Kit (Laptop + Mic + Camera)

Everything you need to broadcast from anywhere on Earth. Laptop, USB condenser mic, webcam with decent low-light, portable ring light, and a VPN because you'll need one. I've broadcast from jungles, hotel rooms, and the back of vans. The truth doesn't need a studio.