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Paul Sellers Hand Plane (no power tools allowed)
No, it is not a power tool. It is a Stanley #4 bench plane that has made three dining tables. Paul Sellers convinced me that quiet work is better. Sharpening whetstone included. I will show you how to rock the plane on pickup.
Kernel Patch Review -- free, and I promise to be kind
Email me your kernel patch. I will review it. I owe the community this one. You get honest feedback. Free. You do not even have to say thank you. But it will be kind -- that is the deal I made in 2018 and I am keeping it.
Old Dell XPS 13 -- my personal patch set, arch installed
My retired 2017 XPS 13. Arch, kernel 6.8 with my own patch set, suspend works, webcam works, trackpad is set up the way I like it. Boots in 3 seconds. If you want to see how I use a computer, borrow this for a weekend.
Hacker's Delight (annotated -- my margin notes)
My personal copy of Hacker's Delight by Henry S. Warren Jr. Every bit-twiddling trick I ever used came from here. My margins are covered in Italian swear words where a theorem surprised me. Handle carefully.
Framework Extraction Workshop -- pull a library out of your real app
Three sessions. Bring a real codebase. We find the patterns worth extracting, pull them into a gem, and ship both the product AND the library. The Basecamp-to-Rails move, but on your code.
Signal Strategy Consult -- free, just fund Signal instead
One hour. Bring your encrypted-messaging question. I will not charge you. If you can, donate the fee to the Signal Foundation. That was the whole point of the second act.
Redis Internals Bootcamp -- 4 sessions
Four 90-minute sessions. We read Redis source together -- event loop, key expiration, the AOF. You walk away able to find a memory leak in anybody's C code. Bring a laptop and a kitchen light.
Inner-Loop Consult -- I make your hot path fast
One hour on a video call. You show me your profiler output. I tell you what 30 lines to rewrite. Works for graphics, numerics, sim, game loops. Does NOT work for web backends -- that is a different sport.
Rails Code Review -- I will tell you the truth
One hour. Push a branch, walk through it with me. I will be honest. Some people cry. Some people ship better code the next day. Most do both.
Rework -- signed, scribbled in
My own working copy of Rework (2010). I wrote it with Jason. The margin notes are my regrets and upgrades -- things we'd change ten years on. Read them before you argue with the book.
Women's Self-Defense Course -- 4 weeks, Enna
Four 90-minute sessions designed for women, by a boxer who has spent 12 years learning what strikes land and what does not. Practical, repeatable moves you can use in the street, in the carpark, in the elevator. No ego, no tough-guy nonsense. Small group (max 8). You will leave able to defend yourself from the most common grabs and attacks -- and knowing when to run, when to shout, and when to fight.
Original ice axe -- my 1978 K2 climb
Not for sale. On loan for museum display, school talks, or serious climbers who want to hold the piece. Free. Treat it like your first child.
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